If you’re not familiar with this term, Anti-Slut Defense (ASD) is a Pick Up Artist term to describe women who put up resistance to men who are trying to seduce them in order to not feel like slut. This term always makes me laugh. It makes me think of a super power that women unleash onto men that are trying to pick them up.
So when I’m reading a blog or article and the term comes up (a read a handful of Pick Up Artist blogs), I always picture a man at a bar trying to seduce a girl and then the ASD kicks in like an invisible, force-field shield stopping him dead in his tracks.
I want to talk about the girls who’s ASD gets penetrated anyway, otherwise known as girls that are easy, or sluts. As I mentioned before, men need sluts to get laid often, and then hate the idea that women can be just as promiscuous as they can be.
I know that society, friends, family, and men haves issues with sluts, but I don’t. Because I know the truth. Women want to fuck. And we don’t always want to be in a relationship to do it, or we don’t have a relationship. But then you’re out at night, you’ve had a few drinks, you feel really good, and the guy your with is really attractive and you’re having fun and… Oh well. Women like to
dream think that men know that we are worth something of value, no matter what our sexual behavior is. We also like to believe that we are worth something more than a wet hole one night stand to some strange guy you just met and can be chaste. But damn, women are human too, and sometimes we want to have sex.
The idea of the slut does not bother me. If they are having fun with their lives, and are safe, and taking care of themselves, and enjoying it, then it’s all good.
BUT! The thing is, of all the girls I know who sleep around, I could count on one hand how many of them are actually okay with it. Not sure if it’s because we’re not built to sleep around or if we are conditioned to not be okay with it. If you do it, own it. And don’t fake own it either. People see right through that insecure bullshit mask, and even you aren’t fooled.
Slut shaming is stupid because it’s not really about the sex, it’s about what that behavior tells you about her character, or even more accurately how you interpret that behavior as a sign that she is a crappy, unlovable person. Judging her by her sexuality choices is oversimplifying.
However, there are a few behaviors that do annoy the shit out of me from sluts:
1- Playing the victim
I hate it when you are hanging out with a girl and she is grinding on five guys, stealing attention (or tries to) from every guy who even winks at you, and ends up dry humping a guy in the club. Then she goes home with him. A week later she calls you up crying that this guy used her and lied to her and everything was supposed to be beautiful pony ride to lovey dovey land. No bitch! I was there that night and I highly doubt your drunk ass remembered his name before you slept with him, let alone formed some kind of relationship with him. It’s okay, you were feeling good and wanted to get laid. I’m not judging. But you feel the need to act like you are a pure virgin living on a rainbow, and must now do this song and dance about how someone took that idea you had of yourself away from you. Whatever, I know this show is for your own ego. Because you know if you just said ‘fuck it, I wanted to fuck’, that others would think you aren’t worth a damn thing in a relationship. I am not one of those people. I don’t care how many people you fuck. I do care how many times you call me crying and fuck up my day of greatness with your preventable self pity.
If you do want a one night stand or whatever, own it. And save the bullshit for
your future husband someone who gives a damn and will judge you accordingly.
2- Using Sex to “trap a man”
This has got to be the dumbest plan ever. It’s comparable to buying a new lipstick in the hopes that it will turn into a butterfly unicorn and make 10 pounds melt off your body. Sounds crazy right? It should, because that’s how fucking crazy and ridiculous it is to think a man is gonna stick around and give you everything you ever wanted just because you opened your legs at his request.
I really hate it when girls sleep with guys hoping that her sometimes company and her easy to come by vagina will be enough to interest him. And then they are shocked- SHOCKED!- when he mysteriously has a girlfriend one day that is not her. He’s not just gonna wake up one day and realize you’re amazing when you hardly spend any time outside the bedroom. Here’s a hint, he can’t see how amazing you are if you’re too busy pretending you are a blow up doll. Sex just means you’re fun in the bedroom. It doesn’t translate to anything else.
Yes, men like to have a good time. But sex is, what, maybe 20 minutes of good times? What about the other 23 and a half hours you are
stuck hanging with him? That is, if he even wants to hang out with you with your clothes on. Sex may be the easiest way to get attention, but it’s always short lived. You have to have something else that will make him want to continue giving you attention. My advice is to stroke a guys’ mind, not his dick. Because it’s the ego’s job to always make you feel good, so help his out.
3- Low Self esteem
This isn’t annoying as much as it is sad. It’s like watching a train wreck in slow motion with these girls who constantly sleep around and then damage their own self esteem and self worth. They regret it and hate themselves for it. And then THEY KEEP DOING IT. WTF?
Personally, I don’t care if someone, anyone calls me a slut. If I wanna fuck, I will. I am a grown ass woman and take full responsibility for what I do
when I feel like it. Whether it’s sex, your weight, your job, or husband, society will always find a way to criticize and judge. What matters most is what you think about yourself. And I already know I’m no angel, just pure awesome.