Anti Slut Defense, HO!

Published December 4, 2013 by bossymoksie

If you’re not familiar with this term, Anti-Slut Defense (ASD) is a Pick Up Artist term to describe women who put up resistance to men who are trying to seduce them in order to not feel like slut. This term always makes me laugh. It makes me think of a super power that women unleash onto men that are trying to pick them up.

So when I’m reading a blog or article and the term comes up (a read a handful of Pick Up Artist blogs), I always picture a man at a bar trying to seduce a girl and then the ASD kicks in like an invisible, force-field shield stopping him dead in his tracks.

wonder woman

Anti Slut Defense system is a go! Vagina is now safe and secure.

I want to talk about the girls who’s ASD gets penetrated anyway, otherwise known as girls that are easy, or sluts. As I mentioned before, men need sluts to get laid often, and then hate the idea that women can be just as promiscuous as they can be.

I know that society, friends, family, and men haves issues with sluts, but I don’t. Because I know the truth. Women want to fuck. And we don’t always want to be in a relationship to do it, or we don’t have a relationship. But then you’re out at night,  you’ve had a few drinks, you feel really good, and the guy your with is really attractive and you’re having fun and… Oh well. Women like to dream think that men know that we are worth something of value, no matter what our sexual behavior is. We also like to believe that we are worth something more than a wet hole one night stand to some strange guy you just met and can be chaste. But damn, women are human too, and sometimes we want to have sex.

The idea of the slut does not bother me. If they are having fun with their lives, and are safe, and taking care of themselves, and enjoying it, then it’s all good.

BUT! The thing is, of all the girls I know who sleep around, I could count on one hand how many of them are actually okay with it. Not sure if it’s because we’re not built to sleep around or if we are conditioned to not be okay with it. If you do it, own it. And don’t fake own it either. People see right through that insecure bullshit mask, and even you aren’t fooled.

Slut shaming is stupid because it’s not really about the sex, it’s about what that behavior tells you about her character, or even more accurately how you interpret that behavior as a sign that she is a crappy, unlovable person. Judging her by her sexuality choices is oversimplifying.

However, there are a few behaviors that do annoy the shit out of me from sluts:

1- Playing the victim

I hate it when you are hanging out with a girl and she is grinding on five guys, stealing attention (or tries to) from every guy who even winks at you, and ends up dry humping a guy in the club. Then she goes home with him. A week later she calls you up crying that this guy used her and lied to her and everything was supposed to be beautiful pony ride to lovey dovey land. No bitch! I was there that night and I highly doubt your drunk ass remembered his name before you slept with him, let alone formed some kind of relationship with him. It’s okay, you were feeling good and wanted to get laid. I’m not judging. But you feel the need to act like you are a pure virgin living on a rainbow, and must now do this song and dance about how someone took that idea you had of yourself away from you. Whatever, I know this show is for your own ego. Because you know if you just said ‘fuck it, I wanted to fuck’, that others would think you aren’t worth a damn thing in a relationship. I am not one of those people. I don’t care how many people you fuck. I do care how many times you call me crying and fuck up my day of greatness with your preventable self pity.

If you do want a one night stand or whatever, own it. And save the bullshit for your future husband someone who gives a damn and will judge you accordingly.

2- Using Sex to “trap a man”

This has got to be the dumbest plan ever. It’s comparable to buying a new lipstick in the hopes that it will turn into a butterfly unicorn and make 10 pounds melt off your body. Sounds crazy right? It should, because that’s how fucking crazy and ridiculous it is to think a man is gonna stick around and give you everything you ever wanted just because you opened your legs at his request.

I really hate it when girls sleep with guys hoping that her sometimes company and her easy to come by vagina will be enough to interest him. And then they are shocked- SHOCKED!- when he mysteriously has a girlfriend one day that is not her. He’s not just gonna wake up one day and realize you’re amazing when you hardly spend any time outside the bedroom. Here’s a hint, he can’t see how amazing you are if you’re too busy pretending you are a blow up doll. Sex just means you’re fun in the bedroom. It doesn’t translate to anything else.

Yes, men like to have a good time. But sex is, what, maybe 20 minutes of good times? What about the other 23 and a half hours you are stuck hanging with him? That is, if he even wants to hang out with you with your clothes on. Sex may be the easiest way to get attention, but it’s always short lived. You have to have something else that will make him want to continue giving you attention. My advice is to stroke a guys’ mind, not his dick. Because it’s the ego’s job to always make you feel good, so help his out. 

3- Low Self esteem

This isn’t annoying as much as it is sad. It’s like watching a train wreck in slow motion with these girls who constantly sleep around and then damage their own self esteem and self worth. They regret it and hate themselves for it. And then THEY KEEP DOING IT. WTF?

fat bastard austin powers

I sleep around because I’m unhappy, and I’m unhappy because I sleep around. It’s a vicious cycle.

Personally, I don’t care if someone, anyone calls me a slut. If I wanna fuck, I will. I am a grown ass woman and take full responsibility for what I do when I feel like it. Whether it’s sex, your weight, your job, or husband, society will always find a way to criticize and judge. What matters most is what you think about yourself. And I already know I’m no angel, just pure awesome.

She-ra claiming her power.

Me? Superhero? Maybe. Saint? Not in a million years.

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16 comments on “Anti Slut Defense, HO!

  • “Playing the victim”, that’s probably the 1 of the 3 that gets to me the most.

    I guess it’s easy for me to say just handle your shit and don’t get all hurt and down on yourself.

    It’s confusing when you try to break it down. Women want sex but can’t really show it. Fine! Yet sleep around and cry when they get hurt.

  • I’m still waiting to find that virgin at the end of the rainbow. Lol.

    I think a lot of women just don’t own their sexuality. Because owning or controlling your sexuality means that the decision to have sex is yours, and it’s unthinkable that a woman would actually want to have sex outside a relationship! God forbid!

    It’s all social conditioning. In certain areas of the South Pacific before European contact, casual sex was actually the norm. Men and women had sex with each other whenever they wanted, openly. There was no dating or monogamy as we understand them. There was no shame or moral significance associated with sex.

    • LOL! Good luck with that, I hope you find that leprechaun and pot of gold at the end of the rainbow as well!
      I agree, we’re conditioned to leave it up to whatever guys you end up messing around with (or settling down with). That’s interesting what you said about the South Pacific area. In the “Men on My Couch” book, she mentioned that women’s sexuality was also open and freely expressed and didn’t start being controlled until Europe was born basically.

  • The whole slut shaming is a feminist term uses to make women feel good about not taking responsibility for their actions. What makes her a slut is how weak her game is. You can’t be a slut and have good game. They just don’t go together.

    Sex is always going to be the number one bargining chip women have with men. If you’re giving that out like mints after dinner, you will always be at a disadvantage. Having a one night stand doesn’t make you a slut. Going out every weekend and banging multiple dudes is what makes you a slut because it shows you don’t value your number one bargaining tool. Also, banging a lot of dudes fucks with your ph balances. Plus, a lot of women who are banging multiple dudes are not protecting themselves. When I was in the dating game, I could count on my hand the number of women who were concerned with protection. I don’t play the raw dog game so I was good.

    If you want to fun fuck, do you. Like you said, don’t complain about it and own it. That’s what separates men from women. Women will say they had sex by accident and they were drunk. Men with just be honest and say yeah I slept with three girls last week.

    • I like that perspective (re: banging multiple dudes in one weekend). Pure game. Different people have different definitions of what makes a slut. I do think a girl who is that extreme is being reckless and unsafe, and that’s not what I’m talking about doing. That ish is just not healthy and usually girls that are that extreme with it have mental issues.
      And you know why women try to pass the blame, because they are conditioned to not own their sexuality. They think they will be ridiculed or judged.

  • #3 sounds like addiction to me. Person takes a fix to feel better, it helps for a bit, but ends up feeling slightly worse, so they take another fix and so on.

    When I was at NLP/Hypnosis courses that exactly how addiction was explained to us.

    I think ASD is not only social programming, but also something that is on instinctive level. The moment girl has sex with guy she loses all power over him, there no more agendas they become equal. For women getting sex is easy, but keeping guy and make him to commit is not always easy.

    There also issue of pregnancy with sex, sure we live in age of protection, but the brain still primal and still executes same instincts and behaviors.

    And also sex is not only pleasure for women but her currency as well.

    • Yeah, #3 does sound like an addiction.
      And yes, there is not only that fear of being judged, but the fear of whether or not the guy will stick around and for how long. There’s no carrot to dangle in front of him anymore. That’s why I think #2 is so dumb. Unless a guy can’t get laid ever, sleeping with him at his convenience is never gonna make him want more from you.
      Re: pregnancy
      That’s why I say be safe and take care of yourself. But when girls are wanting some fun or being seduced by a guy, most aren’t thinking about potential babies that might accidentally happen!

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