Yes, I waited until a full fucking week passed to write this post. But here it is.
As referenced from my previous post, I wanted to explain this question mark concept. Short version? The question mark equals doubts of a relationships. But I wanted to talk about the difference between guys and girls when it comes to the question mark, and warn some of you guys about it.
In the dating scene, men pretty much have one goal in mind and one motivation: to score.
Women have a million reasons to hook-up, get married, get in a relationship, get a man’s attention, date, etc. This is what some might call (I’m looking at you, Kenny) crazy girl logic. As you may have guessed, some of these reasons have nothing to do with you, or even wanting to have sex with you.
Men have a single mission and it’s to get laid, for the night or on the regular. Women have many missions, so many that we can’t even keep up with them sometimes! But they all usually mean one thing. We just want to feel good! We want the things we want, exactly how we want them. Or else! And sometimes we will settle for much much less
while lying to ourselves that we actually got what we really wanted.
Why do we have so many reasons for dating? Because of our own personal question marks!
If guys have a question mark about a girl or his life, it’s obvious (at least to outside eye) because he’ll be pretty shitty in the relationship. He knows that he doesn’t want much more from her and will do the mixed signals dance until the girl gets sick of it and leaves, or until he meets someone he is sure about. I would even say that guys don’t really do question marks, because they figure out pretty fast whether or not they want more from a girl and take things from there. As time goes by, they will learn whether they still want more, or if they are cool where they are.
Girls have question marks. Girls will talk themselves into some shit. Girls will talk themselves out of some shit. Girls will straight out make shit up!
The good news is if the question mark we have is about solely about you, then you have a chance to turn it around. Be confident, and be smart about compatibility. Give her an experience. Make sure you are clear about who you are and what you want from her, and from life. Your job, should you choose to accept, is to change that question mark to a period or an exclamation point. You like it, don’t be scurrred.
Why is this bad news for guys?
If you are looking for just a hook up, it won’t matter. In fact, this will probably give you an advantage.
If not, just be aware: if a woman has a lotta question marks about herself and what she wants out of life, you are shit outta luck. Because whether you get her or not, is related to this question mark and how she wants to
not deal with it. You are a distraction, or a band aid for this thing she is grappling with. As soon as she figures out the answer (which you won’t be the answer), she will be done with your relationship and whatever life you created together. The end. Because she went out with you, and stayed, for the wrong reason. She basically talked herself into being with you because of some question mark she had for herself. I’ve noticed that women are more prone to use dating relationships as a distraction or faulty solution for other issues in their life or within themselves.
While guys will string you along, girls will still make shit official.
Most men wouldn’t make big commitments with you on purpose if they aren’t sure about you. But women will hunker down, set up camp and have 2.5 kids with a guy and still have doubts about him and why she is with him. She will commit and put on a good show. Hell she’s gotta sell it to herself, and she wants an Academy Award. Until the day she wakes up and realizes that she needs to face her questions, or gets her confidence up, and suddenly wants to get far away from you. And then you are standing there, alone, asking, what the fuck just happened?
Why do we do this? Because girls date for other reasons that stem from our own personal question marks. Sometimes that multi-tasking thing us girls are better at bite us all in the dating ass. And not in the fun way.
And P.S.- this is another reason why you guys shouldn’t take rejection so personally. It could have everything to do with you, your game, or your looks. Or it could have nothing to do with you at all.