Date with the Money Guy…Funny Guy FINALE

Published January 31, 2013 by bossymoksie

After the restaurant he decided to take me back to the bar where we met. It all went downhill from the moment we arrived. He apparently didn’t forget to cancel these reservations. He had reserved a private table, that was tucked in a dark corner and was barely lit with a string of those white Christmas lights. I didn’t even know that this existed at the bar.  It was very romantic and would have been great…if it weren’t on a first date that was already disappointing.

It was at this moment that I realized the horror of all horrors; he was expecting me to put out first, without showing me any real money, and he might never. Hell. No. Um, I need to see some good money upfront before I open my legs like any smart hooker. Doesn’t he realize that this goes down when I say it does? I say who and I say when. Yeah, like “Pretty Woman.”

I told myself,’ be pleasant, set boundaries and no one will get hurt maybe he will get the message to spend a litttle more money thought on the next date.’

He wanted me to sit closer.

No thank you.

He wanted to cuddle.

Um, seriously?


I swatted his hand away and he got defensive. He said it was just hair and not a big deal. It’s a big deal if I say it is. He tried-and failed- to make it seem like I was over reacting. Then he said he just thought my hair was nice and wondered what it would feel like to pull it.


He changed the subject while I wondered what it would feel like to punch him in the temple.

At some point, I was sitting on my feet and he reached down to MASSAGE one of them. I stood up and said, “This date is over.”

“What? Why are you so touchy?”

“Because I don’t want to be groped in the back of the bar, especially when I told you specifically on the phone that nothing was going down tonight. I don’t have to go through all this bullshit to fuck someone. This whole date is bullshit! If you are so hard up for sex, just go hire a prostitute with all that money you have!”

He tried to make jokes on the way back to his house, but all he got was a cold, cold shoulder. He called and texted me the next few days after. I knew I was going to have to actually talk to him to get him to stop. So I called him.

“When am I gonna see you again?” he asked, in good spirits.

“We’re gonna have to put this on hold for now…or forever.” I replied. We hung up the phone soon after.

love shopping

A dream deferred.

I’m slightly sad that it didn’t work out as I’d imagined. But hey, you win some, you lose some. And one of my girlfriends consoled me by saying that at least I am hot, with cute feet and hair. So there’s that.


26 comments on “Date with the Money Guy…Funny Guy FINALE

  • What a dork. I’ve found it’s best to stay away from guys like this. It never ends with the promised shopping spree.

    There are plenty of kind, sweet guys willing to court a girl and take her out nice dates, but someone who brags about all the money he is going to throw at you, is only looking for an object devoid of all thought and judgement, not a real person.

    • I wasn’t taking him too seriously when he was pimping out his money over the phone. I didn’t think this was going to be the love story of the ages. I should have left it alone but I was bored and couldn’t resist seeing what would happen.

  • Hmm. I guess no big surprise. This guy presented himself as an anus gland, then behaved like an anus gland. Basic rule of engagement for me: rich + lots of money = asshole. And this guy wasn’t even that attractive… anus gland.

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