Where I answer your questions about love, life and hairy situations (question in bold):
I stumbled across your blog in the “Humor” section of wordpress today and after reading several posts I decided that I love it! Haha well let’s see if you can answer something for me…
Aaah, the first love. Men get away with so much shit as our first loves don’t they? Because we have nothing to compare them to, and we don’t know what the hell is going on or what to do about it. And we don’t wanna let that ‘love’ go.
You mean your cousin’s and friend’s boyfriends who, I assume, treats them well and remembers their anniversary and has a fucking place of their own and a life? Those high expectations? If having high expectations makes you a selfish bitch, then it’s time to embrace your inner bitchdom. And embrace it for life, or else you will have continued heartache and disappointment. Your call.
If being so casual and not thoughtful about your anniversary isn’t important to you, then that was a little thing. But if it was important to you, then it was a BIG THING and he fucked up. Too much time has passed for you to comment on that with him now.
If you don’t want to be at his mommy’s house, then don’t go and let him know why. If you keep going over there, then he thinks that you’re okay with it. See if he tries to get a place and step up. Besides, nothing says ‘I love you’ like telling a bitch to grow up, which he needs to do pronto. Sometimes guys need a swift kick in the ass to get going. Sometimes they need a swift kick in the ass on your way out the door. Only you can determine which one your beau, and more importantly, YOU, needs.
What is with the December cutoff? Is this when he says he will move out or are you waiting to see if the 2012 Mayan apocalypse ends humanity so that you won’t have to deal with it? Just curious.
And how are you selfish for wanting a more appreciative anniversary gift? You need to accept that you do deserve better than some last-minute CVS candy. Women do this all the time. Do you think he’s sitting around thinking about how selfish it is of him to sit up in his momma’s house, or how he got you 4 chocolates last minute as an afterthought? Do you think he’s sitting around fretting about that? Didn’t think so. Why should you? He’s glad you took it and didn’t complain, because you didn’t, did you?
Annoying things: every man is gonna do something annoying. Because unfortunately, nobody’s perfect. Again, how do some of these ‘little things’ make you feel? Listen to yourself. You were ‘let down’ by this experience, so is this really an experience you want to hold onto and continue with? If they are really big things don’t undersell them. The house is definitely a deal-breaker for you.
If you are dating an older man (ten years +), he better have money, property, a job and teach you a few things in life and/or the bedroom, otherwise stick closer to your own age. Older men who date younger women are always trying to get over on them. It’s how it is!
If you want my bitchy advice, please ask away in the comments section or email me at email@example.com. I will answer in a future blog post.