I Got Your Crazy

Published May 13, 2012 by bossymoksie

Hereeeeeee’s Moksie!

You always hear shit from guys about how bitter women are really scary and unattractive, which is their main excuse reason for dating younger chicks. They like to get em while they’re still naive and fresh faced and easy to fool and manage  enough so that they could fuck em up to make them bitter old hags. I see how it is guys. Nice plan there. But men can be bitter little bitches too.

I went out with a guy who was complaining about his ex. Never a good sign. He’s hurting, on the rebound, and currently hates women and the idea of getting close to one. And now you’re on a  date with this dude. Great. After tellin me his sob story of how the bitch before me dicked him over, left him, and maybe threw a lamp or something at him (and he probably deserved it). He shakes his head and says, “She was crazy.”

Dear Men of the World: Please do not complain about your ex on a date, especially the first date. You look bitter, negative, and like a weak ass bitch. Not attractive. We don’t want to hold your hand. Save it for you momma (or whoever you confide in). Even if this is temporary, this is now how we will forever see you. FOREVER.

After a pause he looks at me and in all seriousness asks, “You’re not crazy, are you?”

Oh, so now you are turning your insecurity on me????? This is a such dumb question to ask.

First of all, crazy people never think they’re crazy. And even if they knew they were crazy, or had some crazy ass behaviors like throwing lamps at you or deflating your tires or stalking your future girlfriends on facebook and leaving cryptic messages for them, they’re never gonna admit it!

You may as well ask:

Are you only dating me for my money?

Are you superficial or shallow?

Do you think the world revolves around you?

What does a guy have to do to have sex with you?

You’ll never get a straight answer! They will deny, deny, deny! Especially on a first date! That’s like asking Mitt Romney if all his friends are elitist CEO’s. That’s like asking Jerry Sandusky if he is a pedophile. That’s like asking Zimmerman if he is scared of black people for no reason. They will not answer the question straight. Deny, deny, deny! Just like I would deny deflating your tires if I even think I saw you with some other ho.

Secondly,  you’re supposed to get caught off guard with the crazy, that’s the best part about the crazy! Crazy doesn’t come with a warning label! You don’t get a heads up for crazy!!! You don’t get to plan for that shit! Don’t even try it!


5 comments on “I Got Your Crazy

  • Yep, guys can do that, too.

    If I was dating and I went out with someone for the first time and she started talking about her ex like that (or at all really), I’d just stop the date right there and move on. It’s not just that it’s unattractive, it’s also a waste of my time.

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