Can I just say that I love Megan Fox? Megan Fox is like a genius wrapped in a hot girl wrapped in a decoder ring, wrapped in half-baked feminist slogans wrapped in a self-proclaimed loner who looks great in a bikini wrapped in a conundrum. Which is why her interviews are more interesting than 90 % of Hollywood bitches.
When pretty people talk, other people listen. They don’t really care what you have to say, they just wanna get into your pants. But they will give good nod and eye contact. Mostly. I’ve said some illogical, crazy, insulting things but no one gives a fuck. Sometimes I even speak gibberish to see if a dude notices. They don’t. Sometimes. But people will act like everything you do and say is the most interesting, exciting thing they have ever heard. When really they are picturing all the interesting, exciting things they want you to do with what’s in their pants. Same thing, I guess.
I know that’s what happens when I talk to a pretty guy. I can only half listen cuz I’m really wondering how strong his back really is. That’s why pretty people only need to know a thing or two about a thing or two because it doesn’t really matter what’s goin on in that head of theirs, does it?
This is what happens to pretty people. When we were younger, we were told we could have anything we wanted, and the world was our oyster. Dates, jobs, cookies, free t-shirts, waves, compliments, people takin pictures of you, waves from semi-famous people, invitations, mentors for jobs you don’t even want, extra sour cream without askin from Chipotle, and be able to give speeches about whatever feel like, whenever we feel like it. Also people fall in lust love at first sight, all the time, and all we have to do is show up!
We were promised the world and we are gonna collect, mofos, we are gonna collect! So listen up (as if you’re not already).